+*+ A dream that blurry +*+

well i kinda dream again..this time...was diffrent....urm...
i dream about someone with blur face.
that dream was pretty blurry....=\
we...kinda become ....small...i mean small like bee or somethin..

but that girl face was blur.....i wana know whats next =\

i know i will meet that girl someday..but i wondering...who will might be....and what purpose that the girl came out on my dream =\




waiting for that.hope u get this message .




blurry face.

+*+ Being a Geek Boy is Hard on Love Story +*+

Do you guys love Chuck?
the CIA agent...with with agent Walker..
yeah that tv series ..

hurm...i can see how hard when geek boys in love.
why?
cuz....the skills of conversation was very low .
huuhuhuh yeah...i know that...
hurm ....
well in this story...i look at the girl was very passion at his Boyfriend... lol but he's kinda funy tho.
Anyway, they discus about it. About skills of conversation..
that is the good move to save some relationship being tarring apart.
sometimes..movie geek arnt pretty bad..:)

i wana make my mistake by " being bored kid and being stupid ass quite kid "
being that kid...making my fuckin love story tarng apart.
cuz i dono wat to do .
hurm... u have like......1 year relationship...and i was like....6 month ...
why dont u taech me some lol...
ah nvm....uhuhuh,..its hard to forget about it...
urm...

well i learn some of my friend name apis :D
*apis same school *

Be steady be Innocent Be Cool.
haha ive tried that before and it went well..but...im kinda emoish sometime...LOL
so..ill forget everything that cheer me up . LOL
ahaha....
=_= this post pretty sucks.


nvm...long time i dint post...so...i post that what scrumble in my mind uhkhukhkuhkuhkuh
well..this is just a lil Hehehe..the rest was TOP SECRET!
Agen Brotawski HAHAH



+*+ Coughing +*+

Hurm...recently i always coughing =(

uhuhuh last nite i coughing banyak ni T^T
To much of the " depress! "

my current ly weight is 81
uhhuuh height ? i dono. jahahahah
hhurm i wana loss some weight.
yeah. . . . sometimes my weight is 76...but..then..after i check tomorow..it became 80 suda diz...
me aso heran gila ow HAHAHAHHAAH
pandai betapuk tu lemak2 wakakkaakak

pa bleh buat.....hoohhoho


+*+ I dream about Cookie Monster +*+

Today i dream about her.
hurm.
kami semua at one school.
kami kena denda oleh cikgu.
So we all bediri at out side...termasuk la si "Dia"
hurm.
time tu...aku pun x taw...my dream not clear enough as my dream before.

anyway...time aku pandang depan...someone at my back curi2 pandang....
hurm

My dream not clear enough like before. I can feel that this dream macm.....memerhatikan someone....=\

im not sure enough huhuh...hard to explain.
But she keep looking at me but i dont care cuz...take MANY years to recover ..... the felt with her still the same as the first love.

Oh cookie~ . . .why you hunted me every night in my dream...huhuhu....i try to leave you as u leave me.




8.8.10

+*+ I dont Want to TALK about It +*+

I can tell by your eyes that youve probbly been cryin forever,
And the stars in the sky don't mean nothin to you, they're a mirror.
I don't want to talk about it, how you broke my heart.
If I stay here just a little bit longer,
If I stay here, wont you listen to my heart, whoa, heart?

If I stand all alone, will the shadow hide the color of my heart;
Blue for the tears, black for the nights fears.
The star in the sky don't mean nothin to you, they're a mirror.
I don't want to talk about it, how you broke my heart.
If I stay here just a little bit longer,
If I stay here, wont you listen to my heart, whoa, heart?
I don't want to talk about it, how you broke this ol heart.

If I stay here just a little bit longer,
If I stay here, wont you listen to my heart, whoa, heart?
My heart, whoa, heart.

More lyrics: http://www.lyricsfreak.com/r/rod+stewart/#share

+*+I always been fucked up by ppl. +*+

Oh pity heart,
where else u can run from pain?

i hope that u can never see the pain,
and ncver felt it.
Sometimes i think that knife is the better way to kill the pain.
But i never try it before. hurm

I realy tired of this pain
i wan it gone.


People always fool me
what did i done wrong?
huhuh
i never done wrong with u guys unless u did something bad to me.
T___T
World was never fair to me.


Why...
why..
i realy need answer.
why you like that to me?
huhuhu



i hope that u just kill me if u dont want me anymore and that way i will never felt the pain that u LEFT BEHIND TO ME.

huhuhu am i a monster?
am i non-human like everyone on earth?
am i plastic doll?
huhuhu sometimes i wonder if u all got heart...i think i have one..
Do you have "Feelings"?



Why need to crush someone feelings?

why need to crush someone heart?

Why need to crush someone trust?

Why?




Dont you think if non of these happen the world will be harmony?


no fight no evil inside the smile?





if im a psyco killer. . .
ill kill these unwanted person on the earth.

:)

anyway....i dint know what the fuck im saying....hurm





please...think...i want you to think...
i also got heart and feelings like you.

I also. . .got Feelings. . .

+*+ Feeling Alone at The Beach +*+



yesterday, we were going to the beach.
I follow Mr.Gaban car to go there.
We having a BBQ day.Hohoho
yeah it was very nice. And i get a new friends but i dint much talk to them cuz im not good at communication to others that i really dont know haha.
It takes time to me to biasa kan my communicate with others. huhuh sometimes it takes weeks or month.

uhuhuhuh
hurm...well that day was very relaxing day. . .
i love taking picture so i borrow Mohd Nazrien Camera.
huhuhu...so fuckin nice day.
after i tired taking picture. . .i wana take a walk alone.
I ask them wer the toilet, and then they told me at Hujung sana dorang ckp..

So i take my headphone, On the mp3 player, and switch the song called
Banana Pancakes.
ahh~ the song makes me felt relaxing.
My mind so empty and really realy make me relax.

As i walk. . .the wind, the sound of the ocean and the song. .ahh...its realy nice.
i take my mini cigar and i smoke with it. . .
hurm. . .ocean is make me alive, and calm.

When i goin back to our spot BBQ. . .i remember her suddently but it wont stop me to having a good day.
kinda sad but i like being alone sometimes.

Yeah these past few month i keep buying cheap and mini cigar. . .
why? cuz i rather spending my money then spending on someone or girlfriend.
Not even that, im feeling statisfaction on what im buying and it makes me felt good for it.


hurm i dono sda apa sa ckp ni hahaha....anyway ALERT! BI FAIL!


+*+ Saying thing is easy then doing Things +*+

When ppl told u to stay calm and buat like relax...its hard to me to doin that.
hurm. . what if u guys love someone that u really love. then someone told u that....to forget it just like that......memang la dpt...cuz why? Cuz u dint love that person very well. Cuz u dint love him/her like you love her...

thats why ppl sometimes forget about that.
Easy to say But Hard To Do.
easy to someone say but its hard to me to Do it.....

btw.....today.....and yesterday...._|_

My middle finger.
_|_

+*+ Dreams +*+

I realy hate my dream.
_|_
hurm. . .
i wish i never dream anything.
=\ its a bit boring when got no dream ha!
tapi ok jga right? no dream lol
_|_ dream.

+*+ Very Spoild day +*+

Today i lepak with my frens gaban pam hazik and more.....
then after that..i dono rina was bring my ex to..lol
=_=
then i make dono ja la...haiz..
but things doin great....
and aku balik2 muntah AHHA
after that....we go rumah hantu.....hurm...i abit feel scared.
and that was it...
finish.

+*+ Sucks Day +*+

Today Day....
i feel...
so...
fucked up
Day.

The End

+*+ The Name Of Her +*+

its 4.17 am
today i was very moody.
so when i moody i eat alot.
hurm
i eat

3 bugers
6 egg
2 meggie
3 bun
1 big bawl of rice.
big cup of Nescafe.

and 17 smoke in a night.
well make it 20 for now haha

Hurm while im eating i was watching " Happy Town " at Channel Fox [ 710 ]
while i watching half way,
theres a officer got same name with her.
=_=
when i was looking down making my rolling cigar,
the officer *her dad* called her son name...and the name...is the same name with her.
and i was shocked suddently *yeah kinda stupid*
i was shocked, then all kinda of sad,hurt,love,miss feeling mixed up
T___T
ergh....20 minuites my feeling was good then sudently it change like BOOM!
T__T
uhhhuuh kenapa la hari mangkin sukar and mangkin sakit.
T___T
dam..
so...watch the
HAPPY TOWN
huhu kinda nice cuz got killing part...Love it the blood of human flash.
full of hate and full of blood hunger.
^+^

+*+ My Expression in my mind that disturb me +*+

I only have two words for you. . .
~ Im Done ~

After everything i've done for you every chance that I gave you and yet you still break my heart...
but it's over

Finally ive realized i dont deserve this
and honestly you dont deserve me.
Yeah, i still love you and I probably will for a long time,
But i can't stay here anymore.
It hurts to much.
I guess this is. . moving on. . .
I guess im tired of being the last thing on your mind.
I should have known from the start youd go and break my heart.
You took my love and threw it away as if it were nothing...
To me...Youre everything but to you...
Im just another meantime guy...
You hurt me more than i deserve
how can you be so cruel?
I love you more than you deserve...why am i such a fool?
Now i belive it when people say,
Love is blind coz i must have been blind to love a person like You...

It finally hit me that you dint care when you walked away and never looked back...

Maybe if I had just ignore that last night you come to chat with me, everything would be diffrent and my heart wouldt be breaking right now.

sometimes i think. . .
i wana do exactly you did to me. . .
lead you on...
make you fall for me...
then just let you go...
but then i cant. .


Suddently . . .im hating my self for everything ive ever felt for you.
Somoetimes i wish i would go back and erase the day i met you...but then i will never regret loving you. "Only beliving you love me too"

Thank you for ripping my heart out and breaking it in half...
now i know how much you care.

Watching you walk out of my lofe dosent make me bitter about love, but rather makes me relize that...if I wanted so much to be with the wrong persong how great it will be when the night one comes along..


There is no medication for this illness. No known cure other than TIME.

maybe someday Ill get my heart..maybe someday im not.

maybesomewhere down the wad ill forget to remember you...

One day you will seek love and be sorry that. . .
You trew mine away~

But still. . .i love you.



+*+ Fragile Heart +*+

I got Fragile heart.
Its easy to be broken and its hard to recover it back.
It takes years to recover it.
:(

I taking love seriusly even it takes me one minutes on my life,
:(
now. . .my heart stuck with you.
Hurm. . .
i still wana run away from my own hometown.
i realy felt Very jynx.
yeah i know its sound stupid because of love.


hurm i still planing where can i go. . .
still on research wer can i stay. . .
still doin it hard to find cash. . .




♥ baby~

missing

+*+ Sweet and Bitter Day +*+

Today i dint go class cuz something has happen.
My plan ac2ly is i dint wana see all ma friends today. i wana take alone day, go drawing, alone, jalan2 alone..kinda thing like dat la.

I arived at cosmo at 11.20 gitu la but my plan wasnt work . Hukhukhuk aku tejumpa juga dorang so just layan n wat dono.
yeah i hate ppl that say and mengolok someone in bad shape of those relationshp.
huhuhuh

So i meet them then i say " I got something to do. Chow *with fake smile cuz im sad!*"
so i use the backdoor of MAA door.

So now im going to Suria .. jalan kaki.haha..exercise kono...padahal hahha.

So while im walking to suria i buy some gula2 and air..cuz i dono why i repeatedly felt like i wana vormit balik2 ni huhuhu cuz tadi pagi also got vormit but nothing keluar haha sakit ow my perut ni :( :( :(

After a cople minit me sampai at Sebelum Post officeKK tu....sebelum dia ada tempat jalan and got Kerusi Besi sana, ada Tiga tu. . .so i sit at the middle one cuz the cahaya matahari got no . . .
So i wana take some rehat with smoke but i cant smoke that time cuz to much smoke already.
I take Pamela Shoes and continue drawing .
When i was drawing at shoes some tourist take a picture of me! HAHA
then after that some local people and his beloved gF came and i dint realy hear what there talking cuz im concentrate at my drawing. LOL
after a few second i left my head up and smile. the man ask me about the shoes, ask me ima shoes artists? and my name n facebook and i got my web or blog or something ..
i dint realy heard the rest of it cuz...im to tired that time. No sleep with 2 days kunu, my heart also tired. . . tired been play. . .pain. . .deep pain. . .
huhuh

After that the coples go ahead cp and im still drawing. . .after a few minutes some crazy dudes halau me dari kerusi tu ba but i make dono ja cuz im not in the mood of scared or anything right now.
So i say to the crazy guy


Me : ai..sini ko jan ko bediri duduk kita sama2. . .nah rokok untuk ko
Crazy Dude : aina . .trima kasi ya nak. . .
*he take the cigarate and ask me lighter *
but i got no lighter i say dat time he borow someone passing by lighter ..
ghahahaha yang dia pinjam sama org lalu lalang tu..derek lari...takut kali ahahah
so after 3 minits i think. . .the sun start to aim to my back...so hot ow...so before i contienue back my jalan to suria. . .i give 2 ringgit at plastics to that crazy dude.*secara tapuk2*
then i go .

After i sampai at Suria. . .i continue drawing at book store there. huhu curi design la kono. :D
cuz im still new and im still learning new stuff new design. . .
after that i saw a dark cloud . . .i think mau ujan lebat so i pack my stuff there and head back to Cosmo.

after i keluar from suria. . .the rain already start . so i just jalan ja.
huhuh all the way long....to melimewah bustop there.
When im sitting there i was thinking so many things.
about Her. . .

hurm i still love her but we both aggre that we both need sometimes.
so. . .i respect thatT__T cuz i have to....huhuh im so deep in hurt .

i just termenung...look at the rain droping slowly at the bustop roof.
the man standing at hujung bustop with umbrella . . .i see whole my sekeliling. . .it was like Frozen Picture. . . serius. . it was beautifull that time.
The mom and the son just dont move with the umbrella. . .nvm u guys wont get it juga.

after that i naik Citybus go terminal. After i sampai Terminal. . .
So this time i dont wana masuk Wawasan. Takut tejumpa Her. .
so i take the left side jalan. . .then i ikut the parking dekat bawa underground...when i sampai dekat Parking underground yang mau turun tu....i tenampak her...huhuhuuh...so i make dono ja then lari pegi bawa....huhuhu when she look at me. . .i can feel direct into my heart the pain of love!
huhuh yeah i still love her. .
hurm when i was think back....malu ni huhuh....yala...kawn2 dia nampak...im wet kena hujan... then ntah la..nvm
zzzzz

so i go upstairs and continue drawing pamela shoes. . .sampai la balik...
sebelum balik me gaban and pam go tu Fuk Yuen agen drink there.
huuh

after that..i sampai rumah derek tidur then i wake up~ i forgot to take a shower cuz im to tired now.
huhuh....so..at last im sleep juga :)






ps : yea we break already. . .sepa2 yang dulu wana see me break with her.....sekarang kamu puas hati? spa2 yang wana try break us...sekarang kamu hapy?
nampak org senang pun...x boleh?
kamu mau kasi down aku? aku sekarang down...so...just say what ever u wana say...
harap2 kamu puas hati!? T__T



The end.

+*+ The Month of The Ordinarily +*+

This month was a very shocking Month.
08/2010.
I think this month was thought for me.
well i just keep inside ma heart and lock it :D
1st we got fight with my new friend at collage but not him, her.
yeah but nvm about that the thing was sattle down suda. so now kami kawn balk.
second is well its kinda shock to me that my team was torn apart like that. so its hard to me cuz
what he say to me old day is "i swear become a permenent member in this team" but at last i dono what comes in his mind but its ok. i dint care also. hurm
its been 4 years ive make that clan. dengan titik peluh aku dengan azam and nizam find and make the clan grow biger and biger then...its end like that. kapush....
hurm

Then barubaru ni my friend Rex told me my old friend died in car accident and he got out Front Page News Paper.
huhuhu Cumang we all called him .
huhuh
al-fatiha~

And betambah lagi risau, abit angry, abit jales, abit hate when ppl disturb my beloved one.
but if the ppl ive known them then i dint care. . .
hurm. . .its hard to me to control emotion when someone i dint know bring my bby girl go out
cuz its been twice happen to me in my past love story.
Its hard to me control. i know love is about trust. but it takes time to me to recover my past.
Ada ja org try to down me. to fail me. to look me very deep down on their feet and they will arise above me. huhuh well thats my life.
ppl say me this..ppl say me that...hurm i dint care that also. .
I dint have any feelings to bring them down. . .
hurm. . .
but please. . .im begging to ppl out there . . .i also need the happyness
i also need love.
I am human just like you.
hurmm.. :(

what did you feel when u got everything in your life. . .then someone take you down and then u left nothing? what did you all feel?

i may dint have car, i go collage by bus
im not rich. . .
im not always goodluck person.
i got nothing in ma life.
but i only have my love one.
that enough for me.
huhuhuhu















+*+ Your Sweet Hug +*+

Hohho. today .....eh...not today ac2ly..it was yesterday, hehe when i go join with Hny friends go eat eat...aduh...direk lapar ni T__T hahaha...dugaan la kono padahal wakakak..
Then we go Cp...xD

Hehe... my puasa ac2ly batal ody bah xD
hehe..

We go round2 buat budu di cp macm org gila pusing2 cp..bored = =..
then after that we go starbucks stay2 ony haha no drinks xD dorang ja ada...
While waiting My fren Mr.Gaban and Mrs.Pamela ahahaha..i go smoke smoke with lydia crita2
Then Gaban call me cuz we wana go Bazar . . .
I go masuk dalam and wana say gud bye..bah malu2 kan wakkaka
then i sit abit..chat abit then..i told her that i wana jalan oredy.
She hug me !
HAHAH waw!

Hehe
4.10pm Starbucks
23.810
she's wearing long slif Choclate xD


Bie hny~

+*+ When You Say +*+

When you say I Love You,
You make My Heart Beating Faster.

When You say Ill Be There For You,
I will be there for You.

When you say I Missed You,
You make me Miss you More.

When You say You Affraid,
Ill always be There For You.


When You say Ill be with you Forever,
You Make Me Belive In Love Once More


I Love You BabyMoinky


*Alert English Fail*
xD

+*+ 8.8.10 +*+

I love this date baby! . . .hehe Love you babe

+*+ "Her" +*+

Yesterday i pm "Her" to go out with "Her"

huhuh...i realy cant hold my feelings to "Her".
i realy love "Her" miss "Her" everyday..

Even i smile, Lough, talk, sleep....i remember "Her"
huhuhu
i Know i cant love "Her"cuz she never love me more then i do.
beside. . .i already have feelings with someone. . . but itu pun, the person i minat pun like x da respon hahah yeah ima fat guy ody.....dosent care la huhuhu
...
so i go lepak yesterday with my friends. . .then secara kebetulan that time i stress remember "Her"
......then my friend friends got birthday party and got minum2..
so i go minum la..huhuhu....just minum banyak2. . .to forget it for a while la..huhuu
then i sms si pantat...huhuhh.....cuz i realy in bad feelings...i realy miss "Her"...

CUZ I LOVE YOU !
huhuh but i cant. . .
cuz you already told me when we broke up.

just keep my word. . .
U say me back then i was a fat ass lazy person,
No future,
xda pendirian,
Got No money,
and all bad is me..

You just wait...ill prove that i am change!
ill wake up 4 at the morning doin my drawing...
no sleep doin my drawing!! YOU CALL THAT FAT ASS LAZY KID?
i dont care what u call me..
huhuhu i want mad at you!!!! but .... i cant also..huhuh cuz i deeply in love with ya....but once again...i cant T__T

what u say bad things to me. . .i want to tell you that...

I already change.
I dosen't care you dont want me ...or not love me anymore..
what ive told you the day we broke up. . .


" Ill Keep my all Promise. Because Promise is Promise. . .and thats how i do. If i say....its real Promise."



but i dno whats goin on today....huhu i realy miss "Her"

In prosess im change my self .. . .theres are two bad habit that now i realy work hard to avoid it.

1. Eat while Watching Movies *thats how i end up with big belly . . *
2. Smoking. yeah...im a smoker now . . .cuz all of this shit ive been tru . .



im going to bed...and sms to someone good night that i always do. . .


"Her" still in my HeArT. .

+*+ Guilty Friday to a Lil Kid +*+

Today is friday.
Hurm...like normal day...
but today is not normal for me...something touching happen to me.
urm as my friends sms me at 10 am...
told me to stay at putatan. so i go get ready then go putatan.
after that we stay at one resotran. . .
while we chating theres some very lil boy who selling kuih karipap and kuih pau.
..
..
the boy walk forward to me and say
"bang beli bang....beli la satu "
then i say with hard word.
"ndak! sory la dik aku ndak mo * suara ngan kasar sikit *

then the boy make his sad face and look down to the kuih and walk pass me. . .and he sit belakang sekali...then...some kakak beli his kuih....i just look at the lil boy...i felt very guilty what ive done...
huhuhuhu seriusly..i wanna cry what ive do. cuz i look at the boys face....full with kesusahan dan sedih hhuhu

so i call the boy ..... i take 3 karipap and give him 10 ringgit...=)
hurm then i ask the boy.....

"pa nama ko"

then the boy say

"sufian bang...* then he look at the kuih

hurm i give my money and then he say thanx..huhuhu
but i still felt guilty what ive done to that kids.....uhuhuhu
after that......"she" sms me.... and i told her everything. . .
why? cuz..to control my tears lol.....MALU OW NANGIS!! HAHA
lagi2 depan dua org kawn lama wakkaka
huhu but i felt realy strage today with my atitude...hurm

but atleast the boy smile ^_^...



but...still.....i felt guilty...T__T and sad.....

+*+When I Fall In Love+*+

When I fall in love
It will be forever
Or I'll never fall in love

In a restless world
Like this is
Love is ended before it's begun
And too many
Moonlight kisses
Seem to cool in the warmth of the sun

When I give my heart
It will be completely
Or I'll never give my heart

And the moment I can feel that you feel that way too
Is when I fall in love















With You~



+*+ Can't smile without you +*+

22/06/10
is my day for repeating SPM BM. urm i waiting her sms for wish me luck at that day. . .but someone that i wanna forget my whole life but she sms me..not her that i die to wait her sms.

huhu. well at that time...i change the contact Name to the one who i wait to long for wish me luck.
huhu =(
hurm. . .it dosent mater la.


29/06/10

Today i hang out with my old frens sekolah menengah hhe
we stay kapak la apa lagi huhuh
well first we play game at cc..heheh
then we go buy rokok...then at 5.00pm we go to restoran near cc Anip cosmo.
hohoho we stay there till 10.00pm wakkaka...
we talk about old game like..main pemadam,tepak,digimon,pokemon card,yu-gi-oh,guli, hahaha
and so much thing we talk. =) hehe...then her sms me hehe....i told her that we like beliau2 suda stay2 kopi hehe..then she say...bapak2 org suda ka? hahah
xD senyum2 sendiri time sms then kena ckp org gila hahaha xD

WHEN ERSAFWAN BAGI TAU KISAH LAMA SAYA...
Some girl that i LOVE since i darjah Dua sampai Tingkatan 3 ....at the end Tingkatan 5 Baru ada respone...but i wrong pick a girl make my life ruin and blur till now~ erg...
He told me that
"ko mau tau ka dus, dari ko darjah dua sampai ko tingkatan tiga ko suka..tapi tingkatan 5 baru dia ada respon sama kau, tapi ko salah pilih."

aduh aku dengar gitu pun suda bikin sakit ati huhuhuh..=( haha x pala T_T.
hehe



Time balik....chung and azam go naik bas..
Me , amirul, Ersafwan jalan kaki ja.
hehe...


2/07/10

hohoho~ today i go water world with gaban, pam, jamal and....rina? lol i hope her name was right cuz i dont very rapat..since we all going to water world, i start to know her very well =)
Hohoho.

hehe i can swim abit suda la . =) hehe. . .1 2 round of my hand then stop hahah. still dono how to swim
hehe when i want having a smoke i check my phone~ she sms me sundently haha~ so hapy lur~
she tell me she otw home~
hehe...then i go swim2 play2 water ..
at that time i saw pondan teriak2 ARGH ARGH...*trip2 perempuan teriak* tapi GARAU ahhaha
so funny that pondan nih

xD
but before that we go hantar chery dulu jhuuhh..she cant come join us....cuz she going to her home far far away from kk.

urm

after we finish at around 5 we go karamunsing go eat there. but i always think why when we all go there mesti hujan =/
lol
OMG The nasi ayam was very fuckin delicious ~
and YEAH! Gaban! u right! the food was very fine~
nice~ haha
me and Gaban oder 1 more nasi ahhahahahahahhaha

=D
then after that we all go home and take a rest~~

3/o7/10
was a very bad bad BAD day to me =(

i was so fool not to hold my feelings.
i make a big mistake.
i know she wasn't ready for all this, but my feelings say just tell what u feel and take the risk.

huhuh...T___T what a fool am i ...


that afternoon..i felt like my brain and heart like wana explode with pain and stress......
ergh...why did i fall to her in the first place....how stupid am i...T__T

well its all started with her sweet voice.
When i heard her voice i started to melt~
then i saw her face~

huhuh...i dono why but. . .she is uniqe to me.
huhuhu...everytime i get probs.....i call her...then.. my pain or anger inside me...just POOF! like that in a sec...why? cuz i love hear her voice ... she make me calm that ive never felt before. . .
huhuh...well now...i have to calm my self with my self alone~ ah~ back to normal life with a hate feelings .
i ....realy dont know how to handle this thing....Huhuhu
urm.




T__T




+*+ The Curse Of Heart. +*+

Its been 3 years that i've feel this pain.
Its feel like you lost someone that you really love suddenly leave you or Die in-front your eyes.
I felt boring and dosen't have any . . . strength. Sometime i felt i want to give up.
i always feel like 50-50 to continue or not.

I try many things to wipe these feeling in my heart. But it never go away.
huhuhu I don't know if i can hold on anymore...

Smile is the best option to me to lie my self.
even deep down. . .its pain like hell.


I have found this beautiful girl that makes me calm within a second. . .
Her voice makes me calm even im in deep deep in madness.
but. . .i affraid that at the last. . .its only left a pain again.
Now its left on my mind is. . .should i continue this . . .or just to be alone.

I already lost hope about it.
I already din't feel what it use to be like. .
The Colour is fading away to fast.





I dono what else to say.
My mind almost make me nuts.
and i lost my control. I realy dint feel that. . . . . . . . it was me that Holding the curse of heart.















I Dint Feel Me, I felt "Non".

+*+ The Activities +*+

Hurm i guess its been a while i din't post anything to my blog
Kinda bz tho. haha. urm

Well i wanna story from the first till end.!
=)

Well. . .i ody have finish my semester. now im sem 4! hoho.

We only have two weeks holiday. huhu.
Well at
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
We go Ghost Hunting. Huhuh

Me
Andy Jonathan
Azwandy
Apis
Jen2
Bendick
azim
Sharul

We only 8 ppl...i think lol
Nadim cant join us cuz he let us borrow his handy cam.
huhu

Urm after That day....They planning want to do Ghost hunting The Second.
well i dono i can join or not.

Urm.


at friday i go far away From KK.

Well is tired day.

Huuhuhuh..
Hurm


I dno wat to say but i felt boring uhuhuh...



formspring.me

Ask me anything http://formspring.me/worm333

+*+ Having Difficulty Month +*+

Huhuhu i realy need to work. . .to get some pocket money, so then i can buy anything i want.
huhuh. . .not only wat item can i buy if i get pocket money, when i wanna go out with someone some times....no....always i got money problems...haiz.
Urm i thinking i wanna join my old frens work place... cuz he iinvite me find a work. . .

Urm...not only that. . .if i wanna out with someone special. . . i dono...why everytime i ask her out. . .
then suddently. . .got something happen that prevent me to go out. . .
T______________________T

i realy dislike this thing happen.
Fuck!.
huhuhhu
T___T
i realy wanna go out with her! huhuhu

Hurm. . .neway this month i got real real real new friends! memang rapat giler la!
hahaha
urm wish dia hilang stress and be tenang all the time. . . .hohoho...and someone that long long long ago i always contect dia. . .skarang. . . .we conteck balik =) hohoho! keep in touch!

Peace out.

+*+ They Misunderstud about me.+*+

When i got big probs. . .or small probs. . .i just want to be alone. . .
but sometimes when i get probs. . .
my fren come to see me and say cheer up. . .yeah i know..
but as for me its hard.
so. . .dosent mean i rarely to see u guys means i forget about u guys. . .
and im senang suda...no
u wrong..i always got a probs...and never ever sattle.
And i like to be alone. . .
but in this case when i want to be alone..
.i always meet random friends. . .
so the one who see me first i go hang out with them.
but if they hangout far so i decided not to go...
and hang out with someone else or just hangout with my self.
so dont get wrong.



+*+ Mumbling something something. +*+

hurm . . .i dono wat todo. . .i got my phone back. but i dosent feel wanna use it.
I realy dosent hardly trust a girl and sometimes i feel i dosent like girl. . .dosent mean im gay. . .
Fuck _|_

urm.

Movie. . .urm . .yeah . . i dno wer to watch movie ody. . .i kinda lazy. .dosent have any mood to watch.

Come cosmo everyday i feel like stupid.
Got nothing to think.
Study? Fuck cosmo.
Buku teks teda.
Laptop dono when they wana give.
BODOh.
Makan Duit .

GTH!

urm. . .
nvm about that. . .

i missh her. . .
dats y i get my phone back.
haiz. i want to contec her but....haiya.. dono la...
hurm fuck mid term.
fuck final exam.
Fuck paper july.
i hate BM.
BM pun mo lulus?
zzzzzzzzzz
i realy hate that SUBJECT!

im thinking about kill my self again! hahaha..
urm . . .
arm. . .
erm. . .
I dono wers my garry gone *my fat cat*
urm . . .hope dia dtg balik.

Going to cosmo. . . .i felt stupid.
=_=
hahahha..sound stupid . . .
it is stupid. . .

i hate pretending like an angle. . .but insde like mother fucking bitch.
yeah. . .i know cople of these ppl.
I kinda feel like. . .some time....i want hit them Very very hard right on there face.
give them sucker punch, cuz there are a big fucking suckers.

Urm. . .im gonna force my self to less talk.
Less hang out.
Less smoke while stress.
Less Eat.
Less Spending money.
More hang out with my self and my premium! ahahahahaha xD
Less internet? NA..i cant. its drug to me!

Urm . . .about Freeze Flash mob. . .maybe ill not joining.
Got abit probz.
im thinking something else. i think i wanna stay somewer else. . . .alone with my premium.
but dono wer .
lOl.

Alwasy alone if i wanna go some place. = =
hurm . . . i think i wana find some......thing.....not someone haha...
i dono but. . .still searching. . .maybe tamagochi. . .or. . .urm. . .dno.;..


well i think thats it. . .huhuuh...cuz its late .
Hurm.
Chow.


+*+ Freeze Flash Mob +*+

Well. . .i dono when ba tu. but as i remember hari isnin my friend told me this thing.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qtUNj2BNTsU
Freeze Flash mob


World biggest Freeze Flash Mob in Paris OFFICIAL VIDEO Long Edit


haha....well im gonna record them using my handy cam. . .huhuhu but i want join them oso ba. . .huhuhu...well nvm la. kakaka
But serius this phenomena is around the world ody ow. . .its call Flash Mob Phenomena.